April 21, 2009
My Magical Night with Chester A. Arthur
People keep asking – with their sad eyes – just how I am after my January layoff. Don’t get me wrong – I am grateful for my friends and I love it that people care about me. And I am fine. But everybody is entitled -- once in awhile – to a day of just being whiny.
• My tuna casserole didn’t turn out right for dinner. Actually it did not turn out at all and has retired to the garbage. Husband has lost ten pounds since January – either I’m making sure we eat healthier or I’m a terrible cook. You figure it out. I am writing a new book called “When Bad Cooks Happen to Good People.”
• When applying for a job today I was asked my college activities. Do I put down “Girls for LBJ?” Are you freaking kidding me? Should I say that I was Homecoming Queen and Chester A. Arthur was my date? Give me a break. This company also asked for my college transcripts – so I went online and requested them – Old State U. required that I put down the last semester I was in class. So long ago that Old State U. had “quarters” and not semesters. While I started college when Gerald Ford was president, I was slow to finish and Ronald Wilson Reagan was well into his first term.
• Annoyed totally by the continuing media coverage about how stress-filled life is for the Never-Retiring Baby Boomers. At last, the Greatest Generation has revenge on the petulant Baby Boomers with our lack of pension funds, kids in college, tanking 401Ks, and Social Security Retirement ages of 68 and up. At least we have LASIX and erectile dysfunction drugs and Springsteen and Netflix.
• Irritated by the endless loop of seeking help at the unemployment office with its Orwellian-style name. God forbid we call it what it is. I spent 35 minutes until I finally talked to a live person, who referred me to a voice mail box “that is probably full so it may bounce you back to me, and then you’ll have to call again.” Fortunately I was able to leave my question. Stay tuned. I have not received a call back.
• Totally disgusted with the media coverage of Susan Boyle. The world is shocked that this ugly duckling can sing! Shocked, shocked I tell you. Regular-looking (translated as ugly or homely by media) people are not supposed to have talent or present well. This story just underscores society’s preference for style over substance. Poor Susan Boyles. I read somewhere that people are offering free makeovers to this woman at an alarming rate. When the next Media Event happens, she’ll be tossed away from her Warhol-ian fifteen minutes of fame.
• Dick Cheney. Grrrrrr. Why can’t he stay in his undisclosed location and give peace a chance?
Okay, I feel better. Verbal diarrhea no less. I’m going to spend the rest of the evening either with Bret Maverick or Andy and Barney in Mayberry. I want to end with something positive to correct the balance from my rant. Pull up Sunday’s New York Times editorial page and read Bono’s article, “It’s 2009—Do you know where your soul is?” Quoth the raven.