December 22, 2010

Pinkie Dumped Me

This piece is on the cover of today, Wednesday, December 22, 2010.

She tempted me from the beginning. The minute I saw her – sleek, sexy, modern, and ready to take on the world – she won me over. I had to have her.

Our relationship was immediate. She became a part of my soul, my daily routine.

She was so demanding. She needed things and I spent the money on her. First a pink coat, then more memory, then a car charger. Apps, maps, and magazines. All of it brought us closer together.

There came a time when I knew she had me over the top. One night I took her to bed with me, and my husband put a stop to it. He could not take it anymore, and did not want her in our bed. I understood. Three’s a crowd, and he just didn’t understand my constant desire for her.

Then this morning it all ended as quickly as it began. In the blink of an eye, she was gone. Pinkie showed me the dreaded white screen of death.
I immediately took her to the place where she came from. They eyed me sadly and told me my new update was not available for a month. Either I sell my soul again or settle for something less.

I bought a twenty-dollar GO Phone. The store did not have a car charger, and suggested I go to the nearest Pilot truck stop. Oh, how low I have fallen.

Pinkie now rests with all my old phones, a smart phone among dumber models. But don’t mourn for me. I’ll be just fine.